September 2020 - Emptiness Mind

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There are many, many pleasant and wonderful things about the country. One of them is that if you find yourself waking up very early in the morning, like at 2am, it is not a disturbing thing. What instantly strikes your awareness, warming your heart and calming your mind, is the blissful, peaceful serenity that pervades the air, fragrant with the sweet smell of eucalypt gums, the rich earth and the luminous, crystal clear, star studded sky all around you. Out here, there is no relentless drone of traffic humming endlessly through the night. No pollution to clog up your lungs and poison your airways, no trams, trains, buses or trucks to remind you of the frenetic pace of city life. As modern cities, lost in their directionless pursuit to become 24/7, sleepless buzz points on the globe, the country wisely says, no thanks, and continues on with its timeless embrace of the way mother earth has functioned for millions and millions of years. There is no rushing around to be found out here, just an empty, quiet road, and a people that know when the sun sets and the day is over, it is time to rest one’s weary bones and just be still.

As I sit here, sipping my soothing cup of tea, sitting in the dark next to gently crackling, golden, radiating fire, I listen to the gentle tumbling of water sliding and bubbling over river rocks, meandering it’s way slowly, gently, sometimes rapidly away from its pristine, mountain source, down through the valley, on its way through lush, green, and bountiful farmland pastures and beyond. And one can hear the blessed croaking of frogs, reminding you that out here things are still clean. When you find yourself short on sleep on a night out in the country, you are greeted instead with a harmonious and meditative zone of peace. This country is a tranquil haven that allows one to relax, reflect and to just stop thinking altogether. One is free to enjoy the expansiveness of one’s own consciousness, silent, without tension or stress, open, clear and free.

September 8, 2020

It’s been a while since I have kept a journal. I have considered blogging about being middle aged, although I wonder if I will live to see 100 years.

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We are in stage four restrictions of the covid 19 lockdown. I haven’t seen many friends for many months. Whatty whatty?

I am endeavouring to start a Jenny Craig diet and see if I can lose between 20 and 23 kilos. I weigh 87.45 kilos (weight taken in the morning was 86.60 kilos). At 2pm it was 87.45 kilos. I have reduced the amount of tea I drink, and I am choosing water instead. I don’t know if I want to publish this yet. I had two alcoholic drinks today, because I have suffered from a bad case of loong over the years.

I woke around 8am and had breakfast around 9am. I had a cheese and chive omelette, which I heated in the oven for about twenty minutes. It was really nice and one drink of gin with tonic. Not diet tonic, which I need to buy from the supermarket. I understand the diet is supposed to be without alcohol, but I was feeling stressed when I woke up, so I had a little drink. All the neurotics are going to curse me for doing that of course, which is why this journal will probably just stay private. There. How do you open up and just speak the truth in this society, without fear of a backlash?

You can just hear people say, too early to start and so forth. I meditated for the rest of the morning until 12:15pm, then heated a spaghetti bolognese, which I had at 12:45pm. It was very nice, and I had a whiskey with diet coke as well. Just a small glass. Now, apparently I’m just no good and not following the diet properly.

At 1:15pm, I went for a half hour walk just locally, and wore the face mask, which we all have to do these days. I was generally very puffed, and I know I am overweight. So here’s the awful set of statistics; blood pressure taken at 1:51pm, read 156 over 91, and a heart rate of 91 beats.

I can just imagine what people are saying. Things need to improve. Alright then. So I’ll blog about it, and see whether weight loss over time makes me look better physically. I have a shocking BMI as well. 29.1 and in the overweight range. What could be worse? Dementia?

As far as I’m concerned the compassion and emptiness meditations have been going well. We’ll just have to see how I climb out of this covid 19 crisis. See. This is the thing. I haven’t had covid 19 and I’m not going to get it either.